Kenny + Sha: 10 Fun Facts & Tips For Surviving After I do

This August 18th, my husband and I celebrate 8 years of marriage and 12 years of love.

Awwww, sweet… right?

Hold on. This is not one of those mushy posts. 🤣

Let’s be real—he works my last nerve sometimes, and I know I make him call on Jesus too… maybe more than he’d like to admit. But even in those not-so-great moments, we still love each other.

Right, babe? (I can already see the look on his face.)

Before we get into how we’ve actually survived this thing called marriage, we thought it would be fun to share a few memories—His 5 vs. My 5.

His 5 (According to Him…)

• She went all “Woman Thou Art Loosed” on me before realizing I knew my scripture too.
• She thought we were hoodlums when she first met us.
• She acted like she didn’t want me to come bowling—but when I showed up, the same person who talked to me all day suddenly had nothing to say.
• She gave me a whole speech about how we were taking too long and should just stay friends… so I asked her to be my girl. You know what she said? “Let me think about it.” 😂
• She tried to pass me off to her friends and little sisters.

My 5 (The Truth!)

• He brought an avocado to my church because I once said I liked avocados. (It was actually kind of cute.) 🥑
• He tried to get in my head with deep biblical questions like, “What should a man of God look like?”
• He spent an entire night staring at me when we were supposed to be bowling. No shame whatsoever.
• I spent an hour on the phone with my friend Stephanie trying to decide if I should say yes—after I had already given him a speech about taking too long.
• He ate a full mouthful of Pikliz thinking it was coleslaw when he met my parents. FIRE. IN. THE. HOLE. 🔥

Ahh… we were so young.

Now Let’s Talk About the Real Stuff.

Kenny and I are pretty open about marriage. If you ask us for the truth, be ready—because we don’t sugarcoat it.

Marriage is not a fairytale.

Don’t let anyone sell you that fantasy.

There are days you want to cuddle and thank God for your spouse…
And there are days you want them to just… go sit somewhere for a while.

Marriage is two imperfect people learning how to do life together in an imperfect world. You will argue. You will misunderstand each other. You will say things you wish you didn’t.

But for us, those moments are not an excuse to quit.
They are a signal to lean in, grow up, and protect what we’ve built.

What’s Our Testimony?

Eight years and two kids later, we’re still here. Still committed. Still fighting for this.

Before we got married, our counselor, Pastor Gregory Nelson, told us something that stuck:

If you go into marriage thinking you can leave when it gets hard, then don’t get married.

We spent over three months in counseling before saying “I do.” No fluff. No pretending. He walked us through everything—from communication to conflict to the hard realities couples face. That foundation matters more now than we even realized back then.

We also had strong examples. Both of our parents have been married for over 35 years, and mine are nearing 50. I grew up watching arguments turn into laughter an hour later.

Like my mom always said (and it sounds even better in Creole):
Men are a special breed-you’ve got to woman up sometimes. 😄

What Have I Learned in 8 Years?

• Pray more than you bicker.
• Sometimes you need to pause and revisit the conversation later.
• Try to see their perspective.
• It’s okay to agree to disagree.
• Walk away before things get too heated.
• Don’t let outside opinions shape your marriage.
• Your marriage = Your journey. Stop comparing it to social media.
• Family matters, but your marriage comes first.
• Celebrate effort more than you highlight flaws.
• Keep things spontaneous.
• Surround yourselves with a few real couples who believe in marriage.

Now that we have a son and a daughter watching us, the responsibility feels even greater. We want them to see that commitment is not about perfection, but an intentional decision to persevere.

Marriage is a beautiful journey when both people decide to stick to it and make it work.

So babe… let’s keep doing this thing.